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Everything You Need to Know About Unlocking Self-Confidence

Bach Flower Remedies
By The BACH® Team

The power of self-confidence comes from being able to accept yourself, trust your abilities and handle whatever life throws at you. Being confident isn’t always about how we look on the outside, it’s about knowing exactly what your strengths and weaknesses are and how you value your self-worth on the inside too. It’s about the power of our minds, facing our fears and living in the moment.

Sometimes, we can go through spells of not believing in ourselves and having low self-esteem. We’re here with a toolkit on how to unlock self-confidence, even when you’re feeling a little out of sorts.

What exactly is self-confidence?

Often, we categorise self-confidence and self-esteem as the same thing however it’s important to remember that they rely on each other and are separate emotional components of your personality. While self-confidence is how confident you feel in expressing yourself and your skillset, self-esteem relates to how you feel about yourself physically. Therefore, it can be possible to have self-confidence while having low self-esteem at the same time.

Examples of self-confidence can include things like the willingness to share your deepest truths, being comfortable in your own skin and being able to voice your opinion without fear of being disliked because of it. (1)

Our life decisions, experiences and emotions should all be factored in to measuring our levels of self-confidence. Things like self-care, positive self-talk and overall emotional health and wellness will have an impact on how you’re feeling about yourself.

Self-confidence and emotional wellness

Having good emotional wellness can mean you are often more resilient to cope with tougher times than usual and is paramount when building self-confidence. Feelings of contentment, enjoyment, confidence and engagement are all part of the mental wellbeing umbrella and can be increased by changing your daily habits.

Spending time connecting with people around you, such as family and friends is a great place to start. Make sure you’re building on these relationships. Keep learning- there is no greater power than knowledge. Learning new skills can give you a sense of achievement and a new confidence. Making sure you stay active and take notice of the things around you can also help. Take a daily walk and be aware of the present moment. Take in the sounds around you, feel your feet on the ground, and listen to your feelings and thoughts. (2)

6 benefits of self-confidence

While we’ve now understood what self-confidence is about and how it relates to our mental wellbeing, let’s take a look at the benefits. Having more confidence can have great effects on our home life, work, and personal relationships. 

1. Positive attitude: Self-confident individuals who believe in themselves and their decisions will be able to achieve their goals and feel a sense of fulfilment. They will elude positivity and be able to see the good in most situations, allowing negative thoughts to flow away and making room for more productive and happy energy.

2. Positive relationship with others: It is no surprise that if you’re feeling confident and good about yourself, this will in turn affect your relationships with others. Whether it’s a friend, partner or colleague you’ll find that you’re able to build on the special relationships you have with people around you as you have more ability to listen, help people and be more thankful.

3. Open to new experiences – less fear: Sometimes the fear of the unknown can stop us from making those big life decisions, as well as smaller everyday choices. However, if we’re feeling good about ourselves, we will have the ability to feel less fearful about being open to new experiences. Always wanted to quit your job and start practicing something you’re more passionate about? Or move to another country? Building self-confidence will help you achieve those goals.

4. Emotional and physical health: Our emotional and physical health are more connected than you may think. A person who can build up their self-confidence and self-esteem could also start to see improvements on their physical health and the way they feel, including their outlook on life. It is said that looking after your emotional health can decrease feelings of anxiety, depression and lessen the risk of cardiovascular diseases. (3)

5. Resilience: Confidence and resilience go hand in hand. Being resilient shows your ability to bounce back from the challenges and hardships we may endure in life, maintaining a positive outlook and being well equipped to deal with setbacks. People who are resilient generally have confidence in themselves and can deal with whatever changes life brings.

6. Sleep improvements: Our sleep cycle is often linked back to our overall health and wellbeing. The feelings a person gets from sleep deprivation are anger, frustration, and sadness therefore making it difficult for them to be able to improve their self-confidence. On the contrary, a person who can feel confident and happy in themselves will see improvements in their quality of sleep.

How to Build Self-Confidence?

Understanding the link between self-confidence and positive emotions, it’s now important to outline how to be more confident and ways of taking care of yourself. 

This toolkit is built up of self-care ideas, which can help towards building self-confidence: 

  1. Looking After Yourself: Our bodies are our home, so making sure we take care of ourselves is a fantastic way of to start in your confidence boosting journey. Making sure we eat a well-balanced nutritional diet, as well as doing regular exercise will be sure to boost your self-esteem and confidence. you don’t have to join a gym, it’s all about finding something you love and will be able to keep on top of without losing enjoyment. Another key element of looking after ourselves, is making sure we get the right amount of quality sleep per night. Making sure we wind down before bedtime is so important. Try and stay off your phone, and instead do something relaxing like listening to a podcast or lighting a scented candle. 
  2. Don’t compare yourself to others: We can all be guilty of getting bogged down in comparing ourselves to others. This is especially more tangible now with the likes of social media, where you’re able to scroll through your feed and pick apart the things you see that maybe you don’t have or haven’t achieved yet. It’s important to remember that what we see on these platforms, is a small portion of people’s lives – and more importantly, it’s what they choose to show us. Rather than feeling envy over the things we don’t have, try reflecting on your own positives. A great way to do this is by practicing gratitude journaling or having a gratitude jar. Try starting out by writing one thing each day that you’re thankful for, and you’ll soon find that focusing on yourself and your own great achievements will make you feel great.
  3. Be kind to yourself: Throughout life, we are all learning and growing. Whether it’s at work, home or in our personal lives we are bound to make mistakes. That’s part of the beauty of our experiences, so rather than beating yourself up over doing things wrong or feeling embarrassed try and see life’s lessons through a positive lens. Just as important as it is to be kind to others, we must also try and practice being kind to ourselves. This feeling promotes happiness and confidence, how you treat yourself also sets the tone for how others will treat you. 
  4. Face your fears: Sometimes our daily routines can become part of us and something we struggle to break or change. However, something which helps build confidence, self-worth and self-esteem is facing your fears and trying out something different. Remember, sometimes our imaginations can run away with themselves and certain situations may seem worse in our heads however once we get over that hurdle, facing our fears can be so rewarding. 
  5. Practice positivity: There are many ways we can bring positivity into our lives. A great starting point is positive self-talk. “Self-talk” is an inner monologue that makes you feel good about your life and trains you to thinking in a more optimistic manner. Try drowning out the negative thoughts and doubts with contradicting ideas, it’s important to pick yourself up when you fall and recognise your failings allowing yourself to learn and grow. Alongside this, we should try to appreciate our strengths and successes more. Write them down. Talk about them. Appreciate yourself and what you’ve accomplished in life so far.

Other ways to wrap yourself in positive energy, are by being conscious of who you’re surrounding yourself with. Being surrounded by positive people can have a huge impact on your life and confidence levels. Ask yourself the question of how friends, family, partners, and colleagues make you feel. We often forget that the people we’re closest to have a big influence on our attitude and thinking. 

Finally, practice a power pose. A good way to feel the physical side of positivity is to practice a stance which enhances inner strength and confidence. A power pose is quite simply a body position that helps you feel strong, changing the energy flow throughout your body. Check out this guide on different poses you can do for those times you want to feel confident and assertive: 


Helpful Self-Confidence resources

To conclude, we thought it may be helpful to outline some excellent resources to be sure to help with self-confidence building.

  • Ted Talks  4 – these influential videos from expert speakers on education, business, science, tech and creativity are free for anyone to view online. Ted Talks are helpful ways of expanding your knowledge and exercising the mind.
  • Tiny Buddha 5 – tiny buddha is an excellent portal of quotes, tips and stories to help us feel inspired throughout the day. Complete with themes around relationships, responsibilities, struggles and dreams, the website features insights from people all over the globe as well as social channel communities.
  • I Can Make You Confident 6 – available via Android or iOS, this app is popular in helping reduce feelings of fear and desperation. Designed by the British hypnotherapist and NLP practitioner Paul McKenna, you can access seven-days of ‘mind reprogramming’ exercises to increase confidence and motivation to help you achieve your goals.

Remember, confidence, self-esteem and emotional wellness is a journey. We will go through ups and downs throughout life, and it does take work to build, develop and maintain however when we understand the ways in which we can do this we are well equipped to begin our journey to a brighter future. Your path to building self confidence can start today.

Watch the video guide on how to build self-confidence, here: